The grass is always greener...

when on the other side is sand. This proverb seemed only appropriate when, during the all vol weekend, we PCVs went to a BBQ dinner hosted by the Agro-forestry. Now, I must admit that I'm getting more used to walking into the occasional westernized compound and perhaps coming face to face with a small refrigerator. However, this time, it all but felt like we'd been transported into the set of that Big Brother TV show, when, after walking through a house set up like you'd find in the States (which look completely sterile to me at this point), I stepped off the back porch to a yard full of green grass. Now, you have to understand, the Gambia is to sand and concrete as the ocean is to water and waves.

The week is pretty much a blur now, but it was spent in great company with my training group friends who I used to see at least every week but haven't seen in 3 months. It was nice to see how everyone is adjusting, compare struggles and triumphs and just act like Americans in the company of other Americans for a few days. Now I know what PC all-volunteer and section meetings are like and feel like I've met the majority of the volunteers serving in Gambia. It was also interesting to be around those volunteers who were closing service; partly envying their finished duties, partly enjoying not having to look for a job for another 2 years. At the same time though, just as I anticipated, there was an unnecessary amount of stress that went with the disruption of my settling simplistic Brikama lifestyle. Having visitors stay with you in a developing country is not like entertaining in the States (though I do ultimately enjoy both, it's just more difficult at Camera Kunda). Instead of fretting over whether the roast and potatoes will be finished at the same time and which year of wine will taste best, you have to be concerned about whether everyone will have enough drinking water, especially when the sun light decides when the tap will be flowing. Then there's always the unwanted attention factor of not just one toubab walking through the car park, but a group of 3 or 4, which ultimately encourages the same response as what I would imagine it might be like for "Brangelina" to walk down any street in rural America. *SIDE NOTE: The other day I was riding in a Gele, dressed in a hat and sunglasses, when the boy next to me told me I "looked like this one PC named Mariama who lives in Brikama." I played along until he said he was my neighbor's brother, then I realized I'd most likey be seeing him again and gave in and introduced myself as Mariama as I exited the Gele. Living in this environment makes me re-think the glamorized idea that famous-ness presents to the layman.

But the strange part was I didn't realize how settled I've become until I returned to site and felt even more uprooted than if I had been moving to site for the very first time. It didn't help that soon after, I came down with what I realize now was Giardia for a good 4 days, thus was not able to get back into my work routine, which really does provide a good sense of purpose, hospitality and fulfillment. Furthermore, during the Giardia bout, I learned of the untimely death of one of our support group members. This amazingly strong-willed, compassionate and talented woman was the lead singer in our Allatentu Support Band. Her passing represents a lot and she will sincerely be missed.

In ways that I am not able to describe through words, the meaning of the work now seems somewhat different. Maybe it is because I was already feeling out of sorts before I was informed of her death, but all of a sudden, I feel burdened personally with issues that affect me morally and with issues that affect this country and the nature of the work, ethically. Fortunately and a little ironically, I have a pretty good support system and I realize the impotent thing is to keep physically and emotionally healthy because no one will benefit if those areas fail.

On that note, birthday parties are a great way to relieve stress, especially when they involve hunting for cake bakeries and only finding "topalopa" bakeries in Brikama, as was the way one of my site mates celebrated his.

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And speaking of birthdays, my newest request is just an old fashioned birthday card with the old fashioned cold, hard cash. The reason being, $25 (which is what you get for turning 25 in my book) goes as far as buying the spice cake cake mix and cream cheese frosting they now sell at Kairaba super market!!!! and at least 4 boxes of primly aged wine- the "red" kind.